Almost ten years made worthwhile by one little Crumpled up Zero

Ahhh the Retail Gods are smiling down on me. At my work there is a slogan written on our wall in big bold letters saying, "100% Satisfaction Guaranteed." This statement cannot possibly be true, because, never are we as humans fully satisfied. It's not in our nature. And supposing we could be satisfied, I highly doubt that it would be at a Retail store that you would find that kind of satisfaction, but my workplace guaranteed it...until yesterday. It occurred to me and a couple of my co-workers that a reasonable amount of satisfaction would be around 10%. I mean I think I can provide a customer with 10% satisfaction. That seems achievable. It was almost a miracle...or at least that is what we are going to call it at this time, when the second Zero, in our 100% satisfaction guaranteed sign up and "fell off" the wall. "10% satisfaction guaranteed." I can't wait for the inevitable to happen...the irate customer enters the store already angry because he can be...he is the customer...and that makes him special. He starts to yell at me..."BLAH BLAH BLAH...I'm not happy...BLAH BLAH BLAH..." I look at his dog chewed glasses and lenses with tire marks on them and explain that they are not covered by our warranty.....He slowly turns around...eyes searing with intensity...His finger pointing with adversity...He turns to the sign that has supported his horrendous behavior so reliably when he has complained in the past..and he knows where this sign is by some weird magnetic force...He goes to recite the words on the wall...He pauses...He's speechless...I say, "Have a nice day sir...Keep your dog away from your glasses next time."

I know I won't get away with anything like that the customers will just find another sign somewhere in the building so they can have their little hissy fit and get their way..but it gives me great joy to look up at that sign, and consider the possibilities...10% a perfectly reasonable amount of satisfaction...